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Old 24 Feb 2008, 07:44 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Worst Storylines ever

http://wrestlezone.com/article.php?articleid=205792321

I’d like to thank all of you for submitting your votes for the worst storyline of all time. The response was so big, in fact, that I’m unfortunately unable to include actual email excerpts this time. Instead, I’ve used a weighted voting system to count all of your contributions. In this column, I’ll be revealing your top 10 worst storylines ever, plus a few honorable mentions. I’ll be sharing my comments on all of these angles as I count them down. Then, in next week’s column, I’ll reveal five additional picks of my own that, surprisingly, WrestleZone readers missed out on or under-represented.

Without further ado...
"The Worst Storylines Ever"

10. JR Gets Fired

Jim Ross has been both a beloved and integral part of the WWE family for years. So, logically, when JR went in for a precarious colon surgery, the comic potential was limitless, right? None of you seemed to think so, either. But someone on Raw’s creative team did. The storyline began with JR being relieved of his announcing duties. Linda McMahon, whose acting makes Paris Hilton’s look like Meryl Streep’s, punted Good Ol’ JR in the beanbags, and he was on his way home. The worst was yet to come.

Vince McMahon’s performance as Dr. Hiney, pulling things out of “JR’s backside,” may have been one of the most disgusting and tasteless performances in the history of wrestling. Precious few people found it funny, and no one did when they thought about the reality of the situation: that JR was undergoing a very serious procedure and that, at the time, no one was sure whether or not he had colon cancer. Know who found it less funny than perhaps anyone else? Jim Ross, himself.

9. Hawk as an Alcoholic

WWE made pretty good use of the Road Warriors (as the Legion of Doom) in the early 1990s. Sure, it wasn’t as good as the team’s 1980s heyday in the NWA and AWA, but it was much better than LOD 2000. Don’t blame Droz’s participation, though, for screwing this up. Instead, it was what the WWF creative team decided to do with Hawk that really made it bad.

“Highlights” of this angle included Hawk appearing wrecked on camera, belittling a problem that would eventually take his life. WCW similarly exploited Scott Hall’s drinking problem and, years later, he’s had a very hard time kicking the habit. WWF’s storyline had the additional distinction of Hawk taking an apparently suicidal spill off the top of the TitanTron. He was okay, but his career wasn’t.

8. Vince and Hornswoggle McMahon

Guys, I’ve gotta be honest. Yes, this is bad. Pretty damn bad, in fact. But it is NOT one of the ten worst in wrestling history. Granted, all of you who voted for this put it as part of a list, featuring bad angles far more worthy of this number 8 spot. Still, enough voted for Vince and Horny to put this one on the list. I don’t think we need to remind anyone of what this one’s about, since it’s still going on. I’ll just say that, bad as this one is, there have been way worse.

7. Big Show / Big Boss Man Feud

This feud, which culminated with the Boss Man’s unsuccessful bid for the WWF title at Armageddon 1999, began with his return to WWF TV. Following the storyline death of Big Show’s “father” - who was neither Andre the Giant nor his actual, real-life dad, but a third mystery dad - a funeral was held. The Boss Man exploited the situation by attaching Show Sr’s casket to the Blues Brothers’ car and taking off. Big Show tried in vain to stop him.

This is one of those storylines which, when you mention it out loud, you can’t help but laugh at. When angles like this air, though, they’re often much more brutal to watch than you might remember later. Two closing thoughts here. First, don’t blame Russo and Ferrera for this one, as they had left for WCW a month earlier. Second, why did nobody include the Undertaker’s “hanging” of the Boss Man on their list?

6. The WCW / ECW Invasion

The less said about this one, the better. It could’ve been one of the greatest moments ever in wrestling. Instead, it was an okay angle that helped a couple of guys find a niche in the WWF. Next!

5. Billy and Chuck

Billy and Chuck’s run is much maligned by fans, it seems. They didn’t receive the most points in this running (first place votes, etc.), but, early on, they were in the lead for most votes. What I ask, dear readers, is why? Billy and Chuck was entertaining as hell. In fact, no offense to either wrestler, but this had to have been the best performance by both Chucky and Billy in terms of comedy. The matching headbands, the “pose down” against Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson. God, I even loved the wedding segment!

One reader commented that he didn’t like this storyline because Billy and Chuck bested teams like the Dudleys, the Hardys, and the APA. Well, that’s plenty of reason to hate the angle more, if you’re not a fan of the team. But, you have to admit, they were pushed very solidly and consistently for most of their time as a team. So, while I have to definitely disagree with this storyline being one of the worst ever, I concede on one point: the ending was predictable. WWE was never going to have two straight wrestlers portray a gay gimmick for the rest of their careers. It’s just how the company works.

An interesting note: up until the wedding segment, GLAAD (an American gay rights organization) praised WWE for their treatment of the two gay characters. WWE, human rights leaders? This will surely never happen again.

4. Al Wilson

Another one that, I’ll admit, I loved. Al Wilson’s acting was awful, but in a hilarious, Killer Klowns From Outer Space way. And come on, how could you not laugh at the “widow” Dawn Marie facing off against Torrie in the first ever stepmother vs. stepdaughter match, while wearing a black veil in mourning?

Still, I can’t debate this angle’s place on the list. For the first time ever, WWE killed off a character. And, to make matters more ridiculous, this happened after a night of raucous honeymoon sex with his new wife, Dawn Marie. All pretty over the top, and you were either going to love it or hate it. Most of you went with the latter.

3. “Sexual Chocolate” and Mae Young

Mark Henry’s run as “Sexual Chocolate” included an accidental encounter with a transvestite, an admission that he’d had another with his sister, and, of course, the relationship with Mae Young. Mae was impregnated, despite her advanced age, and gave birth to a hand. Afterwards, nothing more became of the storyline - which was probably for the best. Still, this one definitely deserves to be in the top 3.

I’ve got to be honest. I’ve not been a huge Mark Henry fan. His work in strongman contests is admirable, and he’s supposed to be one of the nicest guys in the wrestling business. So I respect him. Still, I was getting really tired of him being in the main event within the past two years. Then, it hit me:

With all the crap Mark Henry has had to endure, purely for the “sake of the WWE product,” he deserves a Bruno Sammartino-esque run with the strap.

2. Big Boss Man / Al Snow Feud

Wow. Two Big Boss Man angles in the top ten! His second run with the WWF didn’t produce any classic angles, like his feuds with the Mountie and Nailz. Instead, we got the Big Show feud and this. Boss Man cooked Al Snow’s loveable Chihuahua, Pepper, and fed him to Snow. The two wound up facing off in a Hell in a Cell match - which would’ve been a good thing, had the ring not been surrounded by a bunch of well-fed dogs. The match was dubbed the “Kennel from Hell” match and, instead of barking and menacing German shepherds, Boss Man and Snow were in the midst of a bunch of butt sniffing, oft-pooping pooches.

I’m a fan of both of these guys. Al Snow often goes underrated as a great wrestler, as well as an excellent coach. His segments with Mick Foley were great, and he could’ve been used much better in WWE during his last few years with the company. Still, the “Kennel from Hell” feud is a stain on the careers of both Snow and Boss Man. And, in addition, it trailed the number one angle by only a single point in the voting.

And, here it is...the worst storyline in the history of wrestling.

1. Any Use of Eddie Guerrero Following His Death

Agreed. And, though this is a complicated scenario which has actually spanned over several angles, they’ve mostly surrounded the use of Rey Mysterio since 2006. As you can see from the rest of the top 10, fans get uncomfortable when real life pain is exploited in such a way just to get wrestlers over. Honestly, it probably did a lot in making Mysterio received those dreaded mixed reactions after his World Heavyweight Title win.

The exploitation continues now, in the form of the Edge-Vickie Guerrero storyline, which received many votes, specifically. I’ve combined the E-V and other Eddie votes, though, as it’s essentially the same thing done at a different time. It keeps going, and fans are clamoring for it to end. This is not an internet wrestling opinion: this is a wrestling fan opinion. This is a human opinion. WWE, please stop.

Those were the top 10 wrestling storylines in wrestling history, according to you. Thanks to everyone who submitted their votes! I read them all, and there were some excellent choices that didn’t quite make the cut. Here are some honorable mentions which just missed the top 10.

"I'm Your Papi, Dominic!"
David Arquette as WCW champion [Why isn’t this in the top 10? - K.M.]
Miss Hancock's pregnancy
Lita's pregnancy and miscarriage
Tim White's "Lunchtime Suicides"
James Mitchell and Abyss father-son angle
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 07:58 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Both Bossman feuds were awesome, Boss driving around with Show's daddy in the casket, while Show was on top of the casket was hilarious. Show feeding Al Snow his dog was great also.

The Invasion Angle is really underrated, I think WWE should've waited for a few bigger names, but what they did was alright, and a few guys got over huge in the proccess. I always wondered what people thought Vince was going to do with the WCW jobber? It was obvious from the get go, he was going to bury them, I for one enjoyed it.

The Horswoggle/Mcmahon feud is a ratings draw, and if your age is in the double digits you should see its targeted to kids. Aagain, a guy got over huge from this feud, Finaly is going to head line mania because of this feud. We're also probably going to get some classic brawls out of Finlay/JBL, those 2 have all the makings of a great feud.

The Eddie exploitation is mostly Eddie's fault for not having any money when he passed, but like all his friends say, they don't think he'd have a problem with it. All the parties involved 9Rey, Chavo, and his fucking wife) seem to be ok with it. So I don't see the big deal.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 08:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I get most of these choices. The Eddie stuff I wouldn't put quite as high up there and I liked a few of the feuds in the dishonorable mentions section. Like the 'I'm your Pappi' angle and the lunchtime suicides angle.

Most of the Eddie exploitation I think has been horrible. Though the stuff with Vickie and Edge I actually think is fantastic. Vickie is so easily hate able in the role of evil witch and it gives Edge some of the most incredible heel heat in years. This is just going to make Taker beating him at WM or even losing to him at WM that much more awesome at WM moment.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 08:14 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Taker isn't going too lose to Edge, and I loved the "I'm your Papi" angle.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 08:36 PM   #5 (permalink)
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eddie was fucking brutal during the im your pappi angle.... the suplex he gave ray on the steel stairs is still a great moment in wrestling
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 09:49 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Vince v. God and Fake Kane were pretty bad. The kane one had potential, but they really screwed the pooch.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 10:21 PM   #7 (permalink)
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The absence of the Undertaker on the list is rather worrying considering through the 90s he crucified people on Monday Nights on Flaming Crosses...

I would've thrown in Katie Vick but then again Hunter dressing up as Kane with the re-actment just gives it more funny then shocking theme.

Zach Gowen, where the fuck is Zach Gowen!? Hell that was worse then Eugene's stay in the WWE. A One-legged Wrestler who was used as a Crash Test Dummy for Lesner.

I have to mention Rico in there somewhere, forgetable but his name needs to be mentioned.

The Hand Birth should be the rightful Number 1, Eddie Guerrero's career reflected his afterlife and after image with the company. He dragged the Guerrero name through the mud during his career and it's continued to be used as a doormat for generations to come.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 10:31 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Emo-Spidey View Post
The absence of the Undertaker on the list is rather worrying considering through the 90s he crucified people on Monday Nights on Flaming Crosses...

I would've thrown in Katie Vick but then again Hunter dressing up as Kane with the re-actment just gives it more funny then shocking theme.

Zach Gowen, where the fuck is Zach Gowen!? Hell that was worse then Eugene's stay in the WWE. A One-legged Wrestler who was used as a Crash Test Dummy for Lesner.

I have to mention Rico in there somewhere, forgetable but his name needs to be mentioned.

The Hand Birth should be the rightful Number 1, Eddie Guerrero's career reflected his afterlife and after image with the company. He dragged the Guerrero name through the mud during his career and it's continued to be used as a doormat for generations to come.
In ROH and he's been very good on the Indy circuit, and he had good sense too still that dud from White Rapper Show John Brown's catchphrase, " Hallelujah Holla Back".

How the hell did Eddie Guerrero drag the Guerrero name through the mud? He was the best Guerrero in the family, and at one tikme the best wrestler in 2004, and a proven draw.
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 10:41 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Well I was taking liberties but he did admit his shitty past and made it all public for the whole world to see what a fucking mess his life has been. A History of Substance abuse and Violence, brings much pride to the Guerrero family Legacy when the supposed Cream of the Crop was painted out to be some Drugged up Mexican asshole full of Roids.

He was a Great Wrestler just not the Best Person. Not role model material, in fact the WWE quite ingeniusly flipped it to make him a likeable character. Lie, Cheat and Steal which in my opinion was the best and quite frankily the only way they could've ever gotten Eddie over with the fans...

The Dominic who is your Papi thing took things way, way too far and just brought the entire Guerrero's back in the Spotlight for all the wrong reasons...
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 10:55 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Emo-Spidey View Post
Well I was taking liberties but he did admit his shitty past and made it all public for the whole world to see what a fucking mess his life has been. A History of Substance abuse and Violence, brings much pride to the Guerrero family Legacy when the supposed Cream of the Crop was painted out to be some Drugged up Mexican asshole full of Roids.
95% of wrestlers are on drugs, and I'm pretty sure his brothers exposed him to it in Mexico. So they must not have cared for the Guerrero name either. Steroids are drugs, so if a wrestler does them, its no different than a wrestler doing coke, pain mkillers, or being a drunk (which was Eddie's biggest addiction,mas it is most wrestlers). You had a banner of Morrrison and was part of TOWC: Orton, both have been on steroids, and Orton was even smoking pot in front of Stephanie Mcmahon. The pot doesn't like the revelation, that the kettle is calling it black, Spidey.

Quote:
He was a Great Wrestler just not the Best Person. Not role model material, in fact the WWE quite ingeniusly flipped it to make him a likeable character. Lie, Cheat and Steal which in my opinion was the best and quite frankily the only way they could've ever gotten Eddie over with the fans...
Nobody is saying he's a role model, but unlike Benoit, its alright to praise Eddie's legacy.

Quote:
The Dominic who is your Papi thing took things way, way too far and just brought the entire Guerrero's back in the Spotlight for all the wrong reasons...
Opposed To Necrophilia, Undertaker killing his parents, and burning his brother, Vince dying, and a 80 year old lady giving birth too a hand.

How is that soap box?
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Old 24 Feb 2008, 11:33 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Anyone who knocks the 'I'm your Pappi' angle I don't understand. Eddie came across as one of the most sadistic heels ever in that angle. I loved after the PPV match where Eddie said if he lost he wouldn't reveal the big secret and then he lost and comes out and says "I LIED" that was fucking awesome. Rey went way over as a face through it as well. The Ladder match they had for the custody of Dominick at Summer Slam was great as well.
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Old 25 Feb 2008, 12:40 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
3. “Sexual Chocolate” and Mae Young
Wrong. Best storyline ever. So retarded. I love it.

The Tim White suicides were the same type of cringe goodness that makes me watch.
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Old 25 Feb 2008, 06:03 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by The Truthhh View Post
95% of wrestlers are on drugs, and I'm pretty sure his brothers exposed him to it in Mexico. So they must not have cared for the Guerrero name either. Steroids are drugs, so if a wrestler does them, its no different than a wrestler doing coke, pain mkillers, or being a drunk (which was Eddie's biggest addiction,mas it is most wrestlers). You had a banner of Morrrison and was part of TOWC: Orton, both have been on steroids, and Orton was even smoking pot in front of Stephanie Mcmahon. The pot doesn't like the revelation, that the kettle is calling it black, Spidey.

Nobody is saying he's a role model, but unlike Benoit, its alright to praise Eddie's legacy.

Opposed To Necrophilia, Undertaker killing his parents, and burning his brother, Vince dying, and a 80 year old lady giving birth too a hand.

How is that soap box?


How come I always end up in your line of fire?

Plain and simple I just don't like the idea how he made everything so public, sure all Wrestlers have their vices, most of them don't spend their television time exposing their fans to their wicked lifestyles.

Whether they like it or not the like it being a WWE Superstar makes you a role model. So how do we remember Beniot as one of the Best Technical Wreslters ever... after the title Murderer. How will we remember Eddie Guerrero? As a Fantastic Wrestler with a huge Substance abuse problem? Now why don't we remember previously deceased Wrestlers like say the British Bulldog like that? Ohhh that right the Bulldog didn't bring up that shit at all, he just juiced up behind closed doors and forgot to mention he ever did it in promos to get him more over.

Eddie was proud that he had beat his Addictions but Ultimately it was his wicked past that killed him and that's just how it goes. You live life in the fast lane long enough your Heart's gonna give out.

So that's how everyone will remember the most recognised Guerrero on the face of the Earth. As a Talented Wrestler with a Crippling Drug Addiction. Generations looking back probably will not see that as an endearing characteristic...
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Old 25 Feb 2008, 11:31 AM   #14 (permalink)
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How come I always end up in your line of fire?

Plain and simple I just don't like the idea how he made everything so public, sure all Wrestlers have their vices, most of them don't spend their television time exposing their fans to their wicked lifestyles.

Whether they like it or not the like it being a WWE Superstar makes you a role model.

So how do we remember Beniot as one of the Best Technical Wreslters ever... after the title Murderer.

How will we remember Eddie Guerrero? As a Fantastic Wrestler with a huge Substance abuse problem?

Now why don't we remember previously deceased Wrestlers like say the British Bulldog like that? Ohhh that right the Bulldog didn't bring up that shit at all, he just juiced up behind closed doors and forgot to mention he ever did it in promos to get him more over.

Eddie was proud that he had beat his Addictions but Ultimately it was his wicked past that killed him and that's just how it goes. You live life in the fast lane long enough your Heart's gonna give out.

So that's how everyone will remember the most recognised Guerrero on the face of the Earth. As a Talented Wrestler with a Crippling Drug Addiction. Generations looking back probably will not see that as an endearing characteristic...
1.) You say sone dumb things.

2.) So because he didn't hide his past, thats a bad thing? Gotcha. Benoit hid his past, snapped and killed a kid, maybe he should've talked about it with somebody, and the wrestling boom period would've happened, and not got killed because of him. Eddie didn't hide his past, and that is admirable, not something he should ridiculed for.


3.)Most wrestler do. Plus again I say, you praise Morrison and Orton and both have substance abuse problems, Morrison fuckd up his push because of "Substance abuse". Stop being a hypocrite.

4.)The Bull Dog didn't bring up his past, yet everybody remebers him as a junkie. So maybe he should've brought it to the table, and than people wouldn't use his son as the butt of the jokes in locker rooms.

5.)Steroids was the addiction that killed him, but you praise Morrison. How high is that horse?

6.)That's how most wrestlers are viewed/rembered, but none was as talented as Eddie. If you're going too ride Eddie for his addiction, you damn well better be ready too ride 90% of the WWE locker room. Because they all are junkies, in one way or the other.
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Old 25 Feb 2008, 12:24 PM   #15 (permalink)
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i thought the undertaker crucifiction stuff was ridiculous too,

the only good thing to come out of that was that the 'acolytes' became the APA.
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