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Kool aid man's real life biography
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 05:09 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Kool aid man's real life biography

{THIS IS A TRUE STORY}

"SHANE'S LIFE"


Shane didnt have the average childhood like 1 of us would have, he had it real rough, his mother was a crack whore, his father was a paying client, the condom popped and the crack whore got pregnant, she was crying every night, debating weather or not to have an abortion, she finally gathered the money together for the abortion but she just couldnt do it cause she was a feen and she needed blow to suport her crack habit.

1 week after Shane was born, his mother just couldnt afford to suport a kid so she put him in the oven and cooked him.....just joking, she put him in a basket and left him outside a foster home in Northern California, as the year's went by, Shane got used to the fact that he was an "orphan" until 1 hot day in the summer of '79 Shane finally got adopted by a poor black family, from that moment on...thing's would change drasticly, Shane had just turned 6 year's old and insted of recieving a birthday present, he recieved a collar and a leash, you see...his adopted family were a couple of old folk's and they had been slaves during the 30's and 40's and thier reason for adopting Shane was for revenge, they turned this 6 yearold white boy into thier personal "pet kracker" he was literaly thier pet and he lived like that for 8 full year's.

During the winter of '87 thier was a visitor at the O'niel residence {the family} it was thier 38 yearold son Mike, he had just gotten out of the pen on parole for sexually harrasing the "cafeteria lady" at the local "free soup" place anyways luckily for Shane, Mike was not happy with the living arangements and decided to "let Shane free" so to speak, he took Shane under his wing and looked after him...in more way's then 1 you se...not only was Shane treated like an animal for 8 year's, his half brother Mike forced him to listen to "Micheal Jackson" and "Prince" while sticking it up Shane's ass on a weeky basis cause he was so used to bieng the "jail house bitch" for 17 year's.

During the winter of '90 Shane finally got the courage to run away, but didnt know where to go, he didnt even have a elementary school education, let alone a high school diploma, so Shane lived on the street's with the crack feen's and the thug's, he became anerexic{sp} because of the limeted suply of "orange peel's" and "chicken bones" Shane eventualy found a "bat" and unfortunitley used it to kidnap a white woman in the broad day light, as he forced her to take him to her place they started talking and for some shocking reason...fell in love instantly, it was a miricle for Shane, it was a dream come true, she tought him to read and write and tought him how to be a man, they even had a child...believe it or not...a baby girl

by this time it was the begining of '96 and Shane was about to turn 23. every thing was looking great, they had an appt. some money, a family...it was just perfect. i evening Samantha {wife} was watching some mtv with Shane and there was a music video of "Micheal Jackson" Samantha turned the volume up and Shane started getting flash back's, he started shaking, Samantha thought he was dancing and turned the volume even higher and Shane completely lost it, he beat the living hell out of her...thinking it was his half brother Mike, she bareley survived, they got divorced and she took the child, at this point Shane was on the run as the cop's were after him for assualt and battery, Shane managed to leave that town and found himself in Visalia CA. which is a "red neck hick town" with the money he had left on his credit card...was able to find a tiny appt. he got a job at "wall-mart" stalking shelves, he kept a low profile because he knew the cop's were still after him, he purchased a home computer to keep himself ocupied after work hour's and slowly became a non social loner, just him and his computer, he would search the net for message board's to stalk men and women and to have "fantasy cybersex" online, he craved so much attention that he even went around the net trying to spread his nickname, he wanted people to know who he was, that was his #1 goal in life, on 1 occasion he even convinced some guy over the net to meet him, his name was "ICON" they had lunch outside the "wallmart" it was sorta like a "pic nic" anyways, Icon ended up getting shot in Washington D.C

After a long double shift of stalking shelves, Shane went home and decided not to go on the internet that night, he recieved a phone-call...it was Mike{half brother}



Shane - hello..


Mike - Shane..


Shane - who is this..


Mike - im you're semack bitch..


Shane - what?


Mike - you dumb kracker..it's Mike bitch


Shane - hhhow didddd you gggget this numbbbber "shaking"


Mike - wtf motherfuker, you better listen to me bitch


Shane - im hanging up this phone


Mike - "ddaaaddyyy" "screaming"


Shane - "crying" baby girl??


Mike - thats right bitch, i gots yo baby girl right here bitch


Shane - "still crying" dont you hurt my girl Mike


Mike - what was that? dont hurt yo girl?


Shane - calm down Mike...where are you...just tell me where you are


Mike - bitch..who the fuck you think youz talking to muthafuka


Shane - where's my girl "panaking" where is she, i dont hear her NOOOOOOOO


Mike - dont worry Shane, yo baby girl is just fine, she's lying on the bed


Shane - what did you do to her.. WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER


Mike - "laughing"


Shane - where's Samantha?


Mike - "laughing"


Shane - WHERE IS SHE?


Mike - "laughing" i sliced that bitch up dawg


Shane - NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Mike - Shut the fuck up bitch......I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP


Shane - "crying" what do you want from me?



Mike - i want you to listen to this muthafuka


Shane - leave the kid alone Mike...MIIIKKKKEEEEE


Mike - "screaming" dddaaaadddddyyyyy "screaming"


Shane - NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO


Mike - "moaning" "screaming"


Shane - MMIIIKKKKKKKKKKEEEE...NNNNNNOOOOOOOOO


Mike - "laughing" wassup now Shane, i just raped yo baby girl mothafuka...recognize


Shane - "falls down and faints"



1 week later, at the hospitol, Shane find's out that his baby girl is still alive but she's in intencive care and has vaginal tear's.

A sad but true story.
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 12:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Holy fuckin shit, LMFAO!!!!! That was funny as hell yo. I can see it now in the headlines, "Rocky from PWF is on the New York Times Best Selling list" That my PC friend, is a true work of art. *applauds*

:koolaid: after reading that:
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 12:37 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Thank-you....thank-you!!

I wish i had made it up, but it's all the truth.

The Kool aid's man still hasnt replied...he's probably crying just like she did..lmao

And i know that he was on the board's till about 6 am est. cause it said there was 6 member's online but only 3 were showing up in the "user logged on list" so the fact is the Shane's to much of a skank to reply, as a matter a fact, Shane's at "wall-mart" right now...no joke...lmfao



Shane's tap's out after losing the war...lmao
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 01:53 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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To much fucking time on your hands......but god damn after Thrrrreeeeeee fuckin long months thats the first original not being in the Rock charachter or stealing anybodys shit........

Original Ill give you that......

Dumb though......and I still whoooooooped your ass so bad over 5 threads niggggger that you had to think of a reason to end the war with me and that reason was I was Invisble......but if I wasnt what woulda been your reason....

You tapped out to me last night big time and you know it cause you even posted "Dont claim that tappp out on me" so you quit and it took you almost 24 hours to run that little story....

So you think your the shit now......run another little pole......at least youl have a few more votes this time since theres a few more PC members......If they dont vote for themselves of course......Fuckin Loser

Cants See Me....Picture me rollin!!!!
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 01:54 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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PLus you beat me.....what is that? Likje a 2ooo word love letter.....fuck reading it all I aint got the time.
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 01:59 PM   #6 (permalink)
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"I DONT GIVE REMATCHES TO ADOPTED ORPHANS WHO LOOSE WARS"
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 02:18 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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Quote:
Originally posted by THE ROCK
"I DONT GIVE REMATCHES TO ADOPTED ORPHANS WHO LOOSE WARS"
I lost no war.....you tapped out and by this statement
Quote:
P.S dont reply with some bullshit tapout claims
You know you did. Otherwise you wouldnt of typed that.

You had to tapout last night.....I was wooping your ass so bad that you had to quit to think up this little story of yours....thats why you were gone till this morning.
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 02:34 PM   #8 (permalink)
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LISTEN UP YOU WALLMART PIECE OF CRACKER TRASH, YOU TAJE YOU'RE ADOPTED ASS OFF INVISABLE AND I MAY CONSIDER GIVING YOU A REMATCH, UNTILL THEN


"SUBMITTED ORPHANS DONT GET REMECTHES"
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 02:38 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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Quote:
Originally posted by THE ROCK
LISTEN UP YOU WALLMART PIECE OF CRACKER TRASH, YOU TAJE YOU'RE ADOPTED ASS OFF INVISABLE AND I MAY CONSIDER GIVING YOU A REMATCH, UNTILL THEN

I dont listen to niggggers.......but if I did....and I went off Invisble....what will you cry about then when I woop your ass?

Now excuse me while I go for a swim in the river of your tears.
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 02:39 PM   #10 (permalink)
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"AIDS MEN DONT GET REMATCHES"
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 02:43 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Kool Aid Man , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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Quote:
Originally posted by THE ROCK
"AIDS MEN DONT GET REMATCHES"
Niggger men take it up the ass!!!
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 04:18 PM   #12 (permalink)
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i alomst feel sorry for u Kool Aid (ALMOST) HAHAHAHA

WELL DONE ROCK
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 05:47 PM   #13 (permalink)
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ROTFLMFAO!
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 05:51 PM   #14 (permalink)
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^^What BM said^^
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Old 04 Nov 2002, 06:37 PM   #15 (permalink)
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LMFAO....So thats what happen?...I'll be back in a few hours
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