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So Impact fucking sucks...
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Old 01 Feb 2007, 08:40 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default So Impact fucking sucks...

I sit down, and I watch. I figure...self...you're not giving this little upstart fed a chance.

So it opens with a montage that appears to be a variations on both the Katie Vick angle and The Rock vs. nWo angle. Sting gets lit on fire. This Abyss guy is apparently a complete ripoff of Kane and Mankind and also a complete retard. He's managed by some fag in a red suit who likes to curl his eyebrow hair. Pretty lame.

Then there's this "match" between Jerry Lynn and a bunch of no names. There's nothing at all here that isn't done in every other fed on earth...no real innovation at all, in fact I was somewhat underwhelmed by this Jay Lethal character and the most botched jump through the ropes I've ever seen...Lynn is apparently the cream of this crop (which isn't good news for TNA Fan) and he gets canoodled by some schlep in Depends while jobbing out to some emo freak who looked like the epitome of "trying too hard." Sucks. All around.

Then Samoa Joe comes out for a match with AJ Styles...well, I got a phone call for that so I had to miss it...but I'm guessing it sucked ass. I'm prolly right, too.

Then I go back and some retard is dropkicking what looks to be Jacqueline. Then some other retard pulls aside what looks to be Ivory and starts slapping her around. Cheap heat and violence toward women. Low...and lower. Nice...

Jesus fuck...what a fucking pitiful lump of garbage this fucking TNA is. Seriously Trev, I can understand you not watching WWE anymore, but you've got to stop this charade that this crap is better. It's not even as good as SmackDown! ECW maybe...and that's a big maybe...and ECW's got it's own problems right now anyway.

So I dunno. At one point I resolved to pay more attention to this crap so I could shit on it in a more informed way, but it doesn't look like I really need to.

So discuss why you like this shit, and how it's better than WWE. Cause I'm just not seeing it.

EDIT:

Oh shit...here comes AJ Styles...damn, does he look gay......so I guess they didn't have that match when I took the call...they prolly just had some other crappy match with a bunch of losers, jobbing out to life in general...ok. Got it now.

Late.


EDIT:

Well they just wrapped it up with some crappy half assed excuse for a match...that was like 3 minutes...Great Main Event right there...interrupted with Rhino...AJ Styles acting like he hurt his leg going out of the ring and then Rhino and Samoa Joe just standing there watching as he jumps out of the ring again, getting marvelous air and landing nicely considering he was (to quote the almost comically monotoned announcer) "screaming in pain after landing on that leg."



Yeah...complete and total blandness. Not anything even remotely as good as or better than WWE. Just wanted to make sure. Now I'm sure, and I'm pissed because I could've gotten in a game of Madden in the time I wasted watching that shit.

Late.
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Old 01 Feb 2007, 09:22 PM   #2 (permalink)
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TNA was decent before Russo started screwing with it.
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Old 02 Feb 2007, 11:13 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by what777
TNA was decent before Russo started screwing with it.
Who cares

That was then, when TNA was minutely more watchable

No Kurt? Where's Stone Cold Jeff Jarrett? TNA is horrid. But what do you expect from guys working for 300 bucks a night.
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Old 02 Feb 2007, 04:01 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I'll be honest I don't like Impact much at all. It just seems slapped together and underwhelming. The advertisements for the main event feel like filler since they advertise the main event say... EVERY FUCKING 10 MINUTES. And at the end there's the little lame adrenaline rush music video which has highlights from the show... too bad there's nothing worth highlighting. Hell, the music video itself is filler material. If the show were live and had some decent content I'd be more compelled to watch. Until then though, I'll just stick with the TNA dvd's that feature the best TNA matches: most of which from their ppv's before impact debuted.
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Old 02 Feb 2007, 06:58 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Watch a TNA PPV. Watch a WWE PPV. Thats the Pro-TNA argument.


But then again we all know matches with celebrity impersonators, wasting 15 minutes on watching money falling from the sky, or having a member of 3 Minute Warning in the main event..Or having Black Lesnar as any kind of champion just owns.
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Old 02 Feb 2007, 07:56 PM   #6 (permalink)
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^^^^
Agreed on the WWE PPV part...the Pay Off has taken a back seat to the Lead In To RAW...

Late.
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Old 02 Feb 2007, 10:26 PM   #7 (permalink)
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He's managed by some fag in a red suit who likes to curl his eyebrow hair.
He was Sinister Minister in ECW. Suprised you didn't notice.
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Old 03 Feb 2007, 12:27 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The_One
Watch a TNA PPV. Watch a WWE PPV. Thats the Pro-TNA argument.
QFE.
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Old 03 Feb 2007, 03:32 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Exo
Who cares

That was then, when TNA was minutely more watchable

No Kurt? Where's Stone Cold Jeff Jarrett? TNA is horrid. But what do you expect from guys working for 300 bucks a night.
Of which that $300 is used on their hotel bill.
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Old 04 Feb 2007, 05:39 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Sly as hell
Of which that $300 is used on their hotel bill.
We can now watch TNA Sly, Bravo2 is now the official broadcaster of it. It uses the proper announcers aswell. All TNA programming including PPV's will be on there.

Oh fucking joy
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Old 06 Feb 2007, 04:52 AM   #11 (permalink)
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the only good thing that came out of Impact this week was the possible hinting toward a push for christopher daniels. the rest, rushed and lackluster.
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Old 06 Feb 2007, 03:03 PM   #12 (permalink)
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AND CAN ONE OF YOU YAY-HOOS EXPLAIN TO ME WHY SAMOA JOE WEARS A NECKLACE MADE OUT OF ANAL BEADS??!



Late.
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Old 06 Feb 2007, 03:07 PM   #13 (permalink)
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AND CAN ONE OF YOU YAY-HOOS EXPLAIN TO ME WHY SAMOA JOE WEARS A NECKLACE MADE OUT OF ANAL BEADS??!



Late.
...because he's Samoan, duh



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Old 08 Feb 2007, 08:46 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Moving forward, it's Thursday February the 8th and iMPACT still fucking sucks balls.

Just finished watching a three minute segment with Sting, Abyss and that eyebrow curling fag...and it was just pointless. The fag apparently got kidnapped by Sting and hung in a cage that's being used at some stupid match they're hyping, Sting lowers it, Abyss comes down...and this Abyss guy is a complete and total retard, BTW...if you don't think so then you're probably a little tarded, too...seriously, that's how fucking lame he is...

...anyway, Abyss takes some chair shots, gives two, gets the fag out of the cage and leaves.

Garbage. Complete and utter garbage. I imagine that's probably a payoff that gets saved for the PPV, right??

Crap. Complete and utter crap. The fact that Vince will force ECW to outlive this bright shining turd of a fed is fucking hilarious to me...

Late.
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People who use the words "Internet Bullies" are the most pussiest form of pussies you'll ever find. Chances are better than not that any girlfriend they've ever had cheated on them multiple times, probably right in front of them, laughing at their pitiful punk asses the whole time while they sat there and cried. If you or someone you know has been caused grief by an "Internet Bully" then you and/or that person is nothing but a little punk ass bitch, and the world would be a better, more manly place if you'd just jump off a fucking bridge already. Late.
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Old 08 Feb 2007, 09:37 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Glue
Moving forward, it's Thursday February the 8th and iMPACT still fucking sucks balls.

Just finished watching a three minute segment with Sting, Abyss and that eyebrow curling fag...and it was just pointless. The fag apparently got kidnapped by Sting and hung in a cage that's being used at some stupid match they're hyping, Sting lowers it, Abyss comes down...and this Abyss guy is a complete and total retard, BTW...if you don't think so then you're probably a little tarded, too...seriously, that's how fucking lame he is...

...anyway, Abyss takes some chair shots, gives two, gets the fag out of the cage and leaves.

Idk why but that last line made me laugh. So yeah, based on what you just said Impact sounds pretty pointless. It's kind of sad to see WCW's answer to the Rock or Stone Cold reduced to being a magician fueding with a Kane ripoff whom according to him "put two bullets in the back of his dad's head". Seriously. Sting being the TNA champ was fine. Now he's going to city hall and trying to find out if Abyss tried killing someone? Fuck this shit
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