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Old 13 Mar 2009, 03:33 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default The Most Offensive Thread Ever

The other day I was riding on the subway, going to visit the kid I locked in a dumpster out in Hunters Point. So I'm sitting there, eating a Leg-of-Somalian and fingerbanging an invalid (you know, the usual thing) and this Puerto Rican transsexual with an Irish accent and an ill-fitting blonde wig comes up to me and asks, "Pardon me, but do you happen to know the ideal lubricant for having sex with an infant?" So I tell him, "I don't know, ask the pedophile next to me," and I point to the invalid. The invalid is all like, "Buuuuuhhh," and I slowly put my finger to my lips and Dummy quiets down. She sure knows what's coming if she don't quiet down. I gesture to the tranny as if to say, "What a pip, this one." The tranny gives a knowing look, and fires off with, "You know it's actually pronounced PEE-dophile." Frankly, I'm a little miffed by this, because I've been having sex with children for years, so I speak from a position of authorty on the matter. I let it go and went to reading Mein Kampf. I try to think of something clever to say about the negroes or Jews to my newfound PR friend, when the subway car stops and this unbelieveably smoking hot asian chick boards the train. Well, I'm not normally one to be prone to yellow-fever, but I'd eat her Kim-Chee any day. The first thing to enter my head is how good she'd look in the trunk of my car in plastic bags, but that would be crass. So think better of it and say to her, "Boy would I like to chase you through the woods with a hammer." She is not enthused. I poke my pet invalid in the ribs with my thumb and say, "Huddla-huddla, you!" Tears well up in it's eyes and I coo, "Aww, ol' puddin' brain make a cumsie?" and I pat it on the head. I reach my stop, hop off the train and it turns out that kid I had locked up was anally raped to death in the middle of the night. So much for that ransom money.

I'm glad that at least nobody ruined the day with any salty language. How I hate that fresh talk.

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Old 13 Mar 2009, 03:43 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: The Most Offensive Thread Ever

Where's all the ***** to censor this disgusting post?????
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Old 13 Mar 2009, 05:46 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: The Most Offensive Thread Ever

I know, right. Now that these guys...



... are being employed by PWF, they might as well start doing their job.

But fck it, my nggas, why worry when you can talk sht and have a good old time, asshles? Hey D-Von, get the fckin tables, bith, and while you're at it suck a dck.

Really though, nice thread.
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Old 14 Mar 2009, 02:05 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: The Most Offensive Thread Ever

So, as I was saying. I see the dead kid there and feel my socks filling with clear viscousy liquid. I know what's coming next, and sure enough I blow snot from my veiny hog all over the inside of my under britches. That's when I realize that that little molestable cornholed boy-corpse sure could use a hat. Why, he might catch cold! So I strip down to my skivvies and place my nice juicy underwear on his lil' old head, and give kiddo's hair a tussle for good measure.

Just then, I hear some gentleman drop the f-bomb across the street while blackening his wife's eye. Now why would he mar such an appropriate disciplinary lesson by talking such filth?

I'll never understand such classless actions. Tsk tsk.
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 12:38 AM   #5 (permalink)
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:****tard ::*******::st oned:
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 11:27 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 11:30 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 11:34 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 12:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Old 15 Mar 2009, 02:22 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: The Most Offensive Thread Ever

Wait.... stoned is censored?

EDIT - Guess not.
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Old 19 Mar 2009, 05:46 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: The Most Offensive Thread Ever

Did they bring ****ing censorship to PWF... this is ****ing gay...

so any****ingways

there was this dirty herpee infested gypsy of a ****ing prosti that told me the she would pay me three dollars and thirty two ****ing cents if i would get my buddy to jerk his dog off into a garden hose which she had shoved up her anus and after the dog was done cumming allover she, actually might of been a he (i saw a bit of an adams apple) wanted me to eat the seamen out of her dirty unbathin ass, while she gave my buddies dog a blowjob...

anyways for three dollars and change there was no ****ing way i was going to turn down such an opportunity.... so she proceed to jam the garden hose up her ass , It kind of looked like it hurt, a little bit of blood and shit came out, my budy was already in the process of jerking of his 6 month old German Sheppard puppy, so when the dog cummed in the hose we made sure to wash the semen done the hose a bit, had no water so I got my buddy to piss in it, no big deal.... so after this disease infested whores ass was filled will cum, piss blood and shit, i ripped the hose out of her ass and started licking, honestly...it was fun...I ****ing enjoyed every second of it...

five months later this whore gives me a faucking call...tells me that the dog jizz got her knocked up, she said its ok she dont want no child support from my buddies dog, she just wants a hand with a cheap abortion... so I said sure... she came over to my place, I told here to undress, and I told my three year old daughter to go grab a coat hanger, a funnel and some liquid plumber... she grabbed me this shit.... I told the whore to get on the table and spread her ****ing legs.... after parting through the bush and the crab surrounding her diseased **** I stuck the coat hanger up her filthy vagina and started ripping the fetus apart with the coat hanger, man and I tell you there was blood... after I was sure the fetus was in small enough pieces I pulled out the coat hanger, shoved the funnel in her snatch and filled her shit up with liquid plumber.... I the grabbed the vacuum cleaner and sucked all that shit out....

Anyways long story short, this is how me and my ex wife avoided having our second child.....
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