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Old 07 Mar 2004, 02:47 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default The TV Brick

I have a TV brick. It's a foam-rubber piece of shit that looks just like a red brick, except you can throw it at the TV and watch it bounce off the screen without doing any serious damage. I throw that thing a lot. It beats taking out one of my guns and blowing the TV to hell. I feel the need to rant right now, so you're all gonna hear it.

*Larry King has been hit in the head more times than he knows, that pussy-chasing pussy.

*What was "Bob" like before he started taking the *****-enlargement drugs? What a pathetic fucker he is. If growing a big dick makes me look like him, I'll pass. Take one look at his idiot grin and tell me what made his dick bigger? You think his brains may have drained away to a different part of his body?

*I despise some politicians more than others. John Kerry could stick a dog turd in his mouth, chew it like a cigar and smile the entire time. Yeah. I want THAT MAN to be President.

*There is a thin line between love and hate. That sumbitch is running right up my ass now and I don't understand why.

*I hit Peter-head Jennings with my TV brick every day. Then, I switch channels.

*I really don't believe in living the "right" way, whatever the hell that means. I don't go to church. I don't pray. If I can't handle what life throws at me, I deserve to lose.

*I almost died today. Some dirty sonofabitch ran a stop sign at the intersection of 18th and Lake street. I just thank God or whoever is responsible for putting a damn good engine in my Pontiac, and providing me with the reaction time to get out of that stupid bastard's way.

*The term "Bloodless Cunt" is one I plan to use in the near future. Stay tuned for the results.

*Don't accuse this of being a random thought thread. These were all, in fact, pre-meditated thoughts. And theres a point at the end of all this.

*I pissed off everybody I dealt with yesterday, including my Mother. I insulted her and I never should have done that. Fuck the job and the car. Fuck my Ex. I don't give a damn about what people think of me. But I never should have talked badly to my Momma. Respectful children don't do that sort of thing, and I respect my Mama.

Mom, I'm sorry.

But the rest of you money-grubbing fucks can ALL kiss my Cracker ass. I will not get on my knees for anyone and I will ride whatever wave comes my way. I wasn't raised to be a pussy and I won't be one. Insult me. Sue me. Fire me.

*I got my hair-cut two days ago, I hate doing that. I'm neurotic. I wash my hair about 3 times both before and after getting my hair cut. It blows a hole in my day and I get fucking sick of it. I ought to let it grow. Then I might fit in with these freaks in Frisco... I'll open the door at Wendys for you. That makes me entitled to something. Wheres my goddamn cookie?

*And I'll throw a TV brick at you as fast as I can pick it up if you piss me off.

QUESTION: What are the things that piss you off??

Please rant about these things now.

And by god... please don't close or delete this... I want this stuff to get out, I want feedback, I want participation, and I want it right-fucking-now.

-Trevelbond-
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 02:54 AM   #2 (permalink)
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John Kerry is too much of a cartoon character to piss me off, its his minions who do it for me.

Network news pisses me off. ABCNBCCBS are one and the same.

Sportscenter pisses me off. Its more about "look at me" than telling me the ins and outs of the sports world.

Dumbasses given liscenes make me mad.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 03:08 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I hate most of the stupid fucking drivers on the road.

People sit there at a red light waiting to turn right, when NO FUCKING cars are coming.

People getting on the interstate take a fucking hour to get up 30 MPH (which isnt even close to the god damn speed limit to begin with), causing me to have to go slow behind their idiotic asses.

I hate customers that come into the store and want to try on shoes with DIRTY ASS FUCKING SOCKS, then get pissed or offended when I ask if they would like a clean one.

I hate customers that ask for all of the old styles of shoes where we only have a few different sizes, then they get pissed when we don't have their size. Go for a new style you fucking morons.

I hate working, getting my check, using it for everything I have to (rent, gas, lunch break food, etc.) and not having anything left.

I hate having the feeling of worthlessness almost everyday.

I hate the fact that I will always be fucking poor as hell.

More rants to come
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 03:12 AM   #4 (permalink)
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* People who Skip opening cutscenes when first playing VGs Piss me off.

* I'm also In Need of a Job, Which the Thought of Pisses me off.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 03:21 AM   #5 (permalink)
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It took me a while to warm up to the subject but here we go.

I hate not being wealthy enough that I can decide when I want to get up instead of having too.

I hate that I have to put with ignorant rude customers who cant fucking count for shit and make me wait ages for my money.

I hate customers that demand to be served and then take 2 minutes to decide what chocolate they want to eat.

I hate the way it only rains at my place a day or 2 after I mow and the grass grows 6 inches overnight.

I hate the damn sun for being too fucking hot in summer and for not having a switch that I can use to cool the place down.


I hate that I have a slow punture in my front tyre and I have to refill the bastard every 3 days until I fix it.

I hate running out of coke to drink.........period

I hate that KFC's food is never as nice as it looks on the damn signs.

And finally at the moment......I hate having to think of things to put in a what do you hate thread cause it requires work.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 03:50 AM   #6 (permalink)
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*I'm sick and fucking tired of the media. I hear Walter Kronchite(SP?) said that he wouldn't mind marrying a man. Fuck you for delivering such biased news sir. Senile old liberal fucks.

*As I have said before, if you don't like what I have to say, don't talk to me. I don't give a lovely fuck about who I offend. All you are ever gonna get out of me is, ME. I can entertain myself just fine. I don't mind solitude. Which leads to-------------->

*Why the fuck is it that if I am not overly social, I am sick? I don't like people. I don't care to be around them so damn much. Fuck your views of how I should live. The record shows, I took the blows, and did it my way.

*I'm not a flirtatious person. I don't go out and try to "score." I never have and never will. Why is it that I am either gay or impotent if I'm not a sex addict? Fuck.

*I'm tired of an innefective city government around here. I was promised a solution to the homeless problem, NOTHING. I was promised "No lisences for illegals" - NOTHING!!! I feel like shit pumping tax dollars into this bloated monster that refuses to serve my cracka ass. You fucking try it for a while. YOU eat shit-pie every day. YOU jump through the hoops and fork out the money and see NOTHING you have asked for done. When you've done that, get back to me.

*Ted Kennedy.

*I believe government should exist to provide a standing army, to protect the rights of the unpopular and to prevent anarchy. Otherwise, it should butt the hell OUT OF MY LIFE! I believe we are horribly overtaxed, over-regulated and over-nannied by a government that is bloated, incompetent and staffed largely by people who can't find their asses with both hands. Our politicians are whores and our bureaucrats are brain-dead. I suppose I might be called a Radical Individualist. Yeah, that's ME. Thats my new philosophy. Lets time how long this one lasts.

*MORE TO COME. Vitriolic, eh?

Last edited by Trevelbond; 07 Mar 2004 at 05:35 AM. Reason: Bloodless cunts
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 04:42 AM   #7 (permalink)
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If no-one is gonna post... then I'll double post.

*Got-damn! A joke's a joke, but I've had enough of this shit. Suck my litter box. Some people go too damn far with jokes... I get sick of it. I'm not a sensitive guy. People annoy the fuck outta me tho.

*Humming annoys me to no end. Shut the fuck up. I'm the only one who will sing or hum or make noise in my damn car.

*VANDALISM. I was up at the cross on mount Davidson in San Francisco today and I was appaled at what I saw. The words "Fuck Jesus" and "Smoke crack, worship Satan" How senseless. I hope you giggling cretins with the vibrating but-plugs up your asses had a good time. I am certain that I will feel the same idiot thrill when I slash your tires and pour sugar into the gas tank of your car. Vandalism is great fun, isn't it? Burn in fucking hell and don't piss on my god. I don't go to church, but I will destroy the god-haters.

*When I read stories of bleeding-heart, brain-fucked "teachers" ingraining liberalism into our students... I wanna go boom. Enforced liberalism is facism, let the students decide. No matter how dumb the "future" is.

*For those that are wondering, I won't clean up my language. If I want to talk about dick-witted pucker-butts, I will.

*I might even ask your wife to show me a picture of her titties.

*Nothing ventured, nothing gained... right?

*The last two ones were jokes. You dick-witted pucker-butt.

*Smashed, blitzed, hammered, shit-face, wrecked, wasted, knee-crawling, drunker'n a pissant, fucked- up, whacked, slammed, and all way to "That'd be a wonderful idea. Do your people have nice jails here?"

My head has not been right since last Thursday. AND I DIDN'T SMOKE ANYTHING. I'm too old for that shit and I don't run as fast anymore.

I was beginning to worry about myself. I started thinking like a burnt-out old hippie. I recognized the symptoms and quickly banged my head into a cinder block wall 30' away. Once I regained consciousnes, I was all better.

*Thats all for now... more later.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 05:45 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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I hate people that think they look good... and are too ignorant to realize they are fat and out of shape, and need to stop wearing spandex...

I hate it when people tell me to do something, if you want me to do something, you ask me nicely, fucker.

I hate it when people intentionally say your name wrong, knowing they're being retarded and completely immature.

I hate it when people act all hard, and aren't in the least.

I hate it when people pick on animals, if you think you're so tough, you go to a bar, and tell someone you want a fight, then we'll see how tough you really are.

I hate it when people use excessive smilies... *points finger at SC*

I hate it when waiters/waitresses are rude for no reason, it's like, if you're having a bad day, it's not my fucking fault, so don't act like a bitch to me.

I'll be sure to add more as they come...
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:13 AM   #9 (permalink)
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**UPDATE**

The TV brick hit John Kerry a few moments ago...

More news coming up... DAMN YOUR EYES John Kerry... DAMN THEM.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:16 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Yo Trev, get a real brick, it may be more costly but it sure is alot more fun.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:18 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Devilchild
Yo Trev, get a real brick, it may be more costly but it sure is alot more fun.
I tried it with a gun once... it was like saturation bombing of the TV

That TV was broken anyway... and out in the middle of no where.

But I will take your advice sir.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:21 AM   #12 (permalink)
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*Disclaimer: Not responsible for possible damage to TV or surrounding property*
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:23 AM   #13 (permalink)
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~I used to have a TV brick. It was red and said "The Sun" on the side. I lost it. I may look for it later to throw at the shitty programmes on the Hallmark Channel like "Touched By An Angel".

~Why do my friends always ask me for advice on girls? I have no friggin' idea what you should do about your ex or which girl you should stay with. I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT GIRLS! All they get from me is a "dunno" or any answer that I think will make them shut up.

~I hate that little punk from the high school who keeps coming over to my college for lessons. He's a little gay midget and he thinks he's some kinda tough guy. Yeah tough guy, ya got punk'd by me. Hasn't said a word to me since.

~I'm never going to the local KFC again. Every single member of staff, especially the manager, is a friggin' mannerless (that even a word?) jerkoff. I never have any problems with any other KFC except the local one. I never have problems with McDonald's, BK, whatever, only friggin' dumbass Aintree KFC. Piece of shit.
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:23 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Ok you dick-witted pucker-butts... I'm going to bed... its fucking 3:20 here...

Ty all for reading and allowing me to vent my pent up bullshit...
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Old 07 Mar 2004, 06:35 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Alth , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
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Trev, since you logged off while I was brushing my teeth, I'm from Minneapolis, Minnesota... and have fun cutting wood...
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