ProWrestling Fans WWE TNA Forum

Go Back   ProWrestling Fans WWE TNA Forum > ProWrestlingFans > Archives > Creative Writing Archive

The Little Letter
 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 31 Mar 2005, 12:00 AM   #1 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default The Little Letter

A Mindless Rant

The Louisiana Commissioner of Insurance, Robert Wooley, has a forty thousand dollar truck paid for by the taxpayers. Not to be confused by the truck he got last year. The interesting thing about this process is that all of the statewide elected officials get vehicles from the state, excluding the lieutenant governor, who is driven by the state police when they aren’t delivering sugar bowl tickets, and the governor, who is busy eating with Fidel Castro.

Just because Wooley appears to be getting better vehicles than the rest of the state officials (leaving the poorest state’s residents in the dust) doesn’t make him crooked, but why not tell the jokes about it?

I hear he has a slot in his office door for night deposits. He not only has the first dollar he ever made but the plain brown paper bag it came in.

His biggest problem is that he stays away for long stretches- sometimes 7 years… 5 on good behavior.

His hand is out so often his palm is sunburned. He’s easy to find though, he’s always in his office or someone else’s pocket.

He’s just proof that the only way to combat criminals is to not vote for them.

This was sponsored by the re-elect Robert Wooley campaign. “It’s your money, why give it to a stranger?”

-Joe “I haven’t had the chance to be corrupt yet” Little

PS In Soviet Union, corruption jokes write themselves.
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 31 Mar 2005, 12:13 AM   #2 (permalink)
Tom Hanks With-A the Aids
 
Forgotten Sin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Charlottetown, PEI
Posts: 22,635
Rep Power: 726
Forgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICK
Send a message via MSN to Forgotten Sin
Default

good read. guy sounds like quite the money-hog.
__________________




Forgotten Sin is offline  
Old 03 Apr 2005, 11:49 PM   #3 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default Little Letter April 4th, 2005

Taxes Don’t look Right to me

Nothing is certain but death and taxes. The difference is that after death you care if you audited… That’s it. You can’t take it with you; the IRS (Institute Resembling Spittoon) just wants to make sure.

Does anyone else find it odd that the country’s birthday is July 4th but it gets its presents on April 15th?

Taxes are just an annual reminder that the land of the free ain’t.

As Will Rogers once said, “The income taxes have made more kliars out of the American people than golf.”

Consider this when you do your taxes (or next year when you do them if necessary): If you saw the government in a store for that price, would you buy it?

Always have a good stiff drink before you fill out the return. You may not be able to afford it afterwards.

New tax form: A) Name Social Security… B) Occupation C) How much money you made D) How much you have left E) Send D.

This was sponsored by Cess, Poole, and Drane Tax Agency. “Because you are incapable of writing down numbers.”

-Joe “Repeal the 19th Amendment” Little

PS In Soviet Union, taxes are higher because government spends more. The weird thing is everything is provided by the government so could just withhold the proper amount and solve the problem. But then if the problem was solved it really wouldn’t be the Soviet Union, would it?
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 04 Apr 2005, 12:19 AM   #4 (permalink)
A-Boooooooo~!™
 
Trevelbond's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 15,038
Rep Power: 2832
Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.Trevelbond is Paul R Nelson.
Send a message via MSN to Trevelbond
Default

Damn straight.
Trevelbond is offline  
Old 13 Apr 2005, 09:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default Little Letter 4-13-05

Light Bulbs

How many John Kerry clones does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2: one to screw it in and one to flip-flop the switch. (I can’t let the flip-flop thing die yet)

How many President Bush clones does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3: one to plan the strategery, one to delegate the duty, and one to say “mission accomplished”.

How many carpenters does it take to screw in a light bulb? No one knows: it’s the electrician’s job.

How many Zen Buddhists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two: one to screw it in and one not to screw it in.

How many pessimists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None: the old one is probably in too tight.

How many people who don’t look right to me does it take to screw in a light bulb? You should know better than I do.

How many country singers does it take to screw in a light bulb? 5: One to screw it in, and 4 to sing about how much they miss the old one.

This was sponsored by General Electric. “Little, you’ve done it again. This time we sue.”

- “It only takes one” Joe Little

PS In Soviet Union, it takes 3 KGB agents to screw in light bulb. One to read instructions, one to realize there is no electricity, and one to protect these two members of the intelligentsia.
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 13 Apr 2005, 09:48 PM   #6 (permalink)
Let It Roll
 
Rebel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Ontario
Posts: 19,682
Rep Power: 2308
Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.
Default

Nice work, Joe.
__________________
Rebel is offline  
Old 19 Apr 2005, 09:26 PM   #7 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default The Little Letter 4-19-05

Do These people Think?

This is proof that people do not have to use the good sense God gave them. Look at this conversation.

Moron who doesn’t look right to me: It was very unique.

Me: How can something be “very unique”? Given that unique means one of a kind, something can not be more unique than something else.

Moron: (obviously struggling for the right words. A deep struggle I imagine, given their eventual answer as well as the linguistic skills shown in a previous statement) Well, that’s just retarded.

Me: If you truly believe that a statement can be mentally incompetent, you are stupider than you look – which boggles the mind.

It appears that these people no more speak the language than chew it up and spit it out.

On another note: April 21 marks the anniversary of when I started printing these. And yet, I feel so empty inside.

- Joe “Is it just me or has this gag lost its charm” Little

PS In Soviet Union, nothing lasts a year without government support. This has run without government knowledge.

PPS As Will Rogers once said, “Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.”
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 19 Apr 2005, 09:47 PM   #8 (permalink)
Tom Hanks With-A the Aids
 
Forgotten Sin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Charlottetown, PEI
Posts: 22,635
Rep Power: 726
Forgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICK
Send a message via MSN to Forgotten Sin
Default

Happy anniversaary to the Little Letter.
__________________




Forgotten Sin is offline  
Old 19 Apr 2005, 09:58 PM   #9 (permalink)
Nothing for now.
 
_UT_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 4,252
Rep Power: 57
_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers
Send a message via Yahoo to _UT_
Default

No it hasn't lost its charm.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Glue totally owning and exposing EXO

I did. Remember?? You're just following me around acting like a little bitch posting after every post I put down because...well, because hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

You're probably sitting there wishing you had a pic of my kids so you could Photoshop them onto something because that's all you can really do.

Sure...you can take a run at numbfuck SC or plainjane Josh or complete moron Alex or can't get out of his own way Boston...but I don't agree with you about Barry and it's "Rueben Droughns this" "weed that" "your kids this" "Look at me and my halo over my head that."

Whatever. First of all, you don't have any depth of knowledge about any of that stuff, so you're just talking out of your ass. Secondly, you wouldn't be saying any of that shit if Barry Bonds wasn't some roided up freak who you're in love with.

It's fucking gay. I have better things to do than deal with someone who can't even debate a point, rather changes the subject again and again to deflect the fact that he's dead wrong. It's what dumbass 6th graders do...


I honestly don't give a fuck about your opinion. Like I told Alex, they're just words on a screen. I can't believe you don't get that concept...but okay.

I mean...you're the kind of guy that thinks if you yell louder than the other person, you will win a debate. And that's not new either...I've pretty much thought that about you from day one...

I didn't want to put it that way, but since you want to press on...

Lame dude. Just lame. I have better shit to do. You probably should too...but I'm betting you don't...

Late.
_UT_ is offline  
Old 19 Apr 2005, 10:02 PM   #10 (permalink)
Tom Hanks With-A the Aids
 
Forgotten Sin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Charlottetown, PEI
Posts: 22,635
Rep Power: 726
Forgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICKForgotten Sin is a STICK
Send a message via MSN to Forgotten Sin
Default

Glory Glory hallelujah.
__________________




Forgotten Sin is offline  
Old 21 Apr 2005, 03:12 PM   #11 (permalink)
CK
Spin Doctor
 
CK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: oHIo
Posts: 17,758
Rep Power: 5407
CK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DCCK You want to be like DC
Send a message via AIM to CK
Default

I love the Yakov Smirnoff thing....its great

In Russia is freedom of speech, In America is also freedom AFTER speech
In America you watch Television, in Russia television watches you


O poor Yakov...we hardly knew ye...
__________________


CK is offline  
Old 28 Apr 2005, 09:14 PM   #12 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default The Little Letter 4-28-05

The Tangipahoa Parish Department of the Obvious Presents Trains and you

It is becoming painfully obvious that people in this parish have not figured out that when a train and a car meet, the train usually wins. In the past two months, there have been seven cars hit by trains in Tangipahoa Parish.

There is no explanation for this. Trains make a loud noise; they are not silent killers. When a train is coming, it often blows a whistle. The only excuse one may have, is that their head was up their butt, but that would make the whistle echo.

I know this will not be popular opinion, but I don’t write Popular Opinion (may not exist), I write The Little Letter. If a person dies due to their own stupidity, they do the world a favor by eliminating their genes from the gene pool. However, if someone else goes with them, or they do something like stop a train, that is a problem. Thus, Brandon Cutrer, who has fulfilled his lifelong goal of being mentioned in The Little Letter, is light-years ahead of these people despite that being his goal and not looking right to me.

So, to make it as obvious as the department wants, if a train is coming, hit the break. That is the pedal on the left (I don’t think anyone who couldn’t figure this out would be able to drive a standard).

This was sponsored by The Tangipahoa parish Department of the Obvious. “We have no funding. This is the only place we can afford to advertise on.”

- Joe “I always preferred Popeye’s whistle” Little

PS Trains in Soviet Union only go to and from Siberia. Stopping them means nothing.
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 28 Apr 2005, 09:20 PM   #13 (permalink)
Nothing for now.
 
_UT_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 4,252
Rep Power: 57
_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers_UT_ will continue to be publicly fellated by PWFers
Send a message via Yahoo to _UT_
Default

^Strange, I have said the same thing about every one of those accidents.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Glue totally owning and exposing EXO

I did. Remember?? You're just following me around acting like a little bitch posting after every post I put down because...well, because hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

You're probably sitting there wishing you had a pic of my kids so you could Photoshop them onto something because that's all you can really do.

Sure...you can take a run at numbfuck SC or plainjane Josh or complete moron Alex or can't get out of his own way Boston...but I don't agree with you about Barry and it's "Rueben Droughns this" "weed that" "your kids this" "Look at me and my halo over my head that."

Whatever. First of all, you don't have any depth of knowledge about any of that stuff, so you're just talking out of your ass. Secondly, you wouldn't be saying any of that shit if Barry Bonds wasn't some roided up freak who you're in love with.

It's fucking gay. I have better things to do than deal with someone who can't even debate a point, rather changes the subject again and again to deflect the fact that he's dead wrong. It's what dumbass 6th graders do...


I honestly don't give a fuck about your opinion. Like I told Alex, they're just words on a screen. I can't believe you don't get that concept...but okay.

I mean...you're the kind of guy that thinks if you yell louder than the other person, you will win a debate. And that's not new either...I've pretty much thought that about you from day one...

I didn't want to put it that way, but since you want to press on...

Lame dude. Just lame. I have better shit to do. You probably should too...but I'm betting you don't...

Late.
_UT_ is offline  
Old 28 Apr 2005, 09:40 PM   #14 (permalink)
No Frills
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: I'm back here
Posts: 6,344
Rep Power: 254
Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.Nick Saban , if you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife.
Default

The whole Popular Opinion thing or the part about silent killers?
Nick Saban is offline  
Old 28 Apr 2005, 09:44 PM   #15 (permalink)
Registered User
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 5
Rep Power: 0
louisiana2me is on a distinguished road
Default

funny shit Joe (this si Will)
louisiana2me is offline  
 


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
The Little Letter (9-12-04) Nick Saban Creative Writing Archive 2 13 Sep 2004 11:16 AM


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:39 PM.

Attribution:
Powered by Yahoo Answers



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2 © 2011, Crawlability, Inc.