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PWF JACKASS Episode #5
 
 
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Old 19 Feb 2004, 06:29 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default PWF JACKASS Episode #5

Featuring the posters of PWF:

Randy Orton
Hulk Hogan
Sam
Wanderer
O-E-O
STICK

And Starscream as "The Beaver".


Episode #5 "Riches to rags"

**The guys are hanging out on OEO's front lawn**

Stick: Hey guys the Olsen Twits have another book coming out.
Randy Orton: Whee like i care.
Starscream: They need to just blow me like good white bitches already.
Hulk Hogan: Are they legal yet?
Stick: It's called "Turning 18 with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen". They're gonna be doing signings today.
Hulk Hogan: Lame title.
Randy: Lame twins.
OEO: It'll sell like hotcakes.
Starscream: They still haven't given me a blowjob yet....
Stick: Hey OEO bet ya I can bankrupt the Olsen Twins in under an hour and ruin thier careers.
OEO: Yeah right.
Stick: Seriously man I can.
Randy: Bet him ONE DOLLA!
Hulk Hogan: Mortimer...we're back HAHAHA!!!
Starscream: DAMMIT I WANT MY BLOWJOB!!!
Stick: OK yer on for a buck.

**Sam walks up**

Stick: SAM just the person i wanted to see.
OEO: You feeling well Stick?
Sam: REALLY???
Stick: Well... NO but you haven't gayed anything up for...18 seconds so i'm gonna buy you a book.
Sam: Cool guy.

**Everyone hops in OEO's minivan and they hit the bookstore**

Sam: WOW!! So many little girls.
OEO: Damn long line we'll NEVER get in.
Randy: Ok Star STRIP!
Starscream: HELL NO!!
Hulk Hogan: But look at all the white girls there.
Starscream: HOT DAYM!

**Star gets naked and rolls up to the crowd**

Starscream: HELLLOOOOOO LADIES!!!!

**The girls yell PERVERT and start beating the hell outta Star while Stick has Sam buy the book and tells him what to say at the signing table**

Starscream: OW HEY BITCHES!! OW THAT'S MY COCK I NEED THAT LEGGO!!!!
Sam: OH MY GOD MARY KATE AND ASHLEY OLSEN I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN!! I GOT ALL YOUR MERCHENDICE I SEEN ALL THE FULL HOUSE I LOVE YOU TWO!!

**They sign his book both smiling**

Stick: GOD DAMMIT SAM!!!! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!!!
Sam: What I do???
Stick: YOU GAYED UP THE OLSEN TWINS SO BAD!!!

**The crowd stops the beating and looks at Sam holding the signed copy then panic**

Little girl: NOOOOOOOOOO!!! MOMMY MARY KATE AND ASHLEY ARE GAYED UP!!!!
Teenage girl: You two were like cool but now your like NOT COOL!!!
Mother: WELL I NEVER!!! YOU TWO SHOULD BE ASHAMED!! YOU CALL YOURSELVES ROLE MODELS!!!

**The guys look on wide eyed as parents and children return the books for refunds and leave***

Mary-Kate: BUT BUT BUT!!! I WANT ATTENTION!! LOOK AT ME!!!! LOOK AT ME!!!
Ashey: SHUT UP SIS STOP WHINING!!

**A cellphone rings**

Mary-Kate: Hello?? MOM you heard??? What do you mean you're moving away without us? WHAT your lawyers said WE'RE BANKRUPT?????
Ashley: GIMME THAT!!!! Now you listen here...SHIT she hung up on me!!
Mary-Kate: I WANNA BE RICH I DON'T WANNA BE POOR LIKE THE SHEEP THAT BUY ALL THE CRAP WE PUT OUT!!! NOBODY IS PAYING ME ANY ATTENTION!!
I WANT ATTENTION!!!!!!

**Mary Kate RIPS open her shirt**

Mary Kate: LOOK SEE!!! LOOK AT MY TITS!! PAY ME ATTENTION DAMMIT!!
Ashley: I called our agent he said our careers are SUNK! Nobody but the porn industry will touch us now.
Stick: OEO PAY UP!
OEO: Damn here you go man ONE DOLLAR!
Mary Kate: GIVE ME THAT!!!!

**Mary Kate lunges for Stick's dollar**

Mary Kate: PLEASE I'LL GIVE YOU A BLOWJOB FOR IT!!!! I NEED MONEY!!

**Ashley SLAPS Mary Kate**

Ashley: SNAP OUT OF IT!!!

**Mary Kate starts crying then runs into a nearby houseware department and opens up a bottle of Clorox Bleach**

Store Clerk: HEY DON'T DO THAT!!! YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR IT!!

**Mary Kate ignores him and starts guzzling the gallon of Clorox and dies after a few minutes of gagging on the floor**

**Three weeks later on OEO's front lawn**

OEO: Damn man you bankrupted them alright.
Hulk Hogan: Wonder what happened to the other one.
Starscream: I dunno but i'm NEVER listening to you guys again...my dick looks like a Twizzler now.
Randy: Hey it's Wanderer.
Wanderer: Hey guys you see THIS yet?
Stick: What is it?
Wanderer: Ashley Olsen dropped her last name and is now Ashley Analfreak the porno star. This is her first video "I'm not gayed up, I take cock up my ass."
Sam: Huh?
Stick: Be quiet Sam stop gaying up the porno tape.

Announcer: Wait til her second video guys..."Ashley gets gangbanged at the circus". And tune in next time for more PWF JACKASS!
Starscream: DAMMIT I STILL DIDN'T GET MY BLOWJOB!!! I'm STILL gonna kill that bitch announcer just you wait.
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Old 19 Feb 2004, 07:37 AM   #2 (permalink)
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i think you should change characters every few episodes. Like diffrent posters.
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Old 19 Feb 2004, 01:44 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I add guests when i need em.
Changing the lineup ruins shows.
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Old 19 Feb 2004, 04:32 PM   #4 (permalink)
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yeah, change up the characters a bit. still hella funny
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Old 19 Feb 2004, 06:32 PM   #5 (permalink)
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LMFAO, that's fuckin hilarious.


He can't change characters. If he took Sam and I out, who would be there to gay everything up, and what regular would say Sam was gayin everything up?!


Everyone has their catchphrases, just like a sitcom lmao. This stuff is fuckin great. Keep em comin
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Old 20 Feb 2004, 08:37 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by STICK
LMFAO, that's fuckin hilarious.


He can't change characters. If he took Sam and I out, who would be there to gay everything up, and what regular would say Sam was gayin everything up?!


Everyone has their catchphrases, just like a sitcom lmao. This stuff is fuckin great. Keep em comin
just what stick said, i like how HIJ adds characters in while not changing the main focus..good job adding the ILC character for a few episodes. Maybe you should put eminempac in one edition..he could just rattle off fake ass rhymes, or use Taker 89 saying Peace My Dudes..now that would be some funny shiot.
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Old 21 Feb 2004, 10:54 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HULK IS JOB!
I add guests when i need em.
Changing the lineup ruins shows.
id like to offer my services as a guest star ....... this is the funniest motherfucking stuff ive read in a long time.......
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Old 22 Feb 2004, 11:31 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Once again thats some funny shit
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