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Funny or Not? Family Guy Jokes My Friend Created
 
 
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Old 28 Aug 2003, 08:24 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Funny or Not? Family Guy Jokes My Friend Created

These jokes were never on the show, but my friend did create them. What do you think?

Louie: "Okay, Peter, name something you would bring on a picnic."
Peter: "A gun?"
[The crowd laughs.]
Louie: "That's really funny, but seriously, what would you bring on a picnic?"
Peter: "A gun?"
Louie: "No, Peter. Name something you would bring on a picnic."
Peter: "A gun?"
Louie: "You would not bring a gun on a picnic. Name something else."
Peter: "A gun?"
Louie: "Peter, you're starting to annoy me. Please answer the damn question: what would you bring on a picnic?"
Peter: "A gun?"
Louie: "I can see this isn't working. Okay, Peter, what would you use to kill me?"
Peter: "A picnic basket?"

Peter: "Lois, people will do anything to be on television. Remember the time I pretended to be bisexual to get on The Howard Stern Show?"
[Flashback: Peter is on the Howard Stern Show.]
Howard: "So, Peter, you're a homosexual?"
Peter: "No, Howard, I'm bisexual."
Howard: "So you like it both ways?"
Peter: "Yeah."
Howard: "So you like having sex with women?"
Peter: "Yeah."
Howard: "So you like having sex with men?"
Peter: "Yeah."
Howard: "So you like having sex with farm animals?"
Peter: "Yeah. Wait, I mean yes."

[Peter is on Hollywood Squares.]
Robert: "I'll take Peter Griffin to block."
Tom Bergeron: "Okay, Peter, which element on the periodic table has a mass number of 178.49?"
Peter: "That would have to be salt."
[Everyone laughs.]
Peter: "Heh! But seriously, salt is the answer."
Robert: "I agree."

[Peter and Lois are in a car together.]
Peter: "This is my actually my first time. I'm really nervous and I hope I don't chicken out at the last second. I love you, Lois, but I'm not sure I can go through with this. I know it's strange that I'm thirty-one years old and I still haven't done this, but I've always feared what might happen. I want this moment to be special. I need to be more prepared for this, and right now, I don't think I'm prepared. I need more time to think this through. I'm just not ready. Look, Lois, I'm sorry, but I think we better call this whole thing off."
Lois: "Peter, it's just a kiss."

Peter: "Excuse me, Ashley, I know this is hard for you to understand, especially since you're only seven years old and your brother just died from leukemia, but I'm afraid your father was gunned down today at a 7-11."
Ashley: "Daddy's dead? Oh no! Where's Mommy!?"
Peter: "She was the one who shot your father. Then she pulled the trigger on herself."
Ashley: "You mean...Mommy's dead?"
Peter: "Yes, and now you're going to live in an orphanage."
Ashley: "Oh no!"
Peter: "Smile! You're on Candid Camera!"
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Old 28 Aug 2003, 08:51 PM   #2 (permalink)
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um, ok. I guess I don't really know. Maybe Kurt will know if they're good or not. I think they're kinda lame though.
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Old 28 Aug 2003, 08:57 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Good...but not great.
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Old 28 Aug 2003, 08:59 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Funny or Not? Family Guy Jokes My Friend Created

Quote:
Originally posted by CrossfaceVictim
[Peter and Lois are in a car together.]
Peter: "This is my actually my first time. I'm really nervous and I hope I don't chicken out at the last second. I love you, Lois, but I'm not sure I can go through with this. I know it's strange that I'm thirty-one years old and I still haven't done this, but I've always feared what might happen. I want this moment to be special. I need to be more prepared for this, and right now, I don't think I'm prepared. I need more time to think this through. I'm just not ready. Look, Lois, I'm sorry, but I think we better call this whole thing off."
Lois: "Peter, it's just a kiss."
I don't know if its just me or not but I think I seen a show where they used that dialogue.
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Old 28 Aug 2003, 09:13 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I think it sounds exactly like Peter Griffin. The idea that Peter would be so stupid to keep saying "a gun" over and over and then say "a picnic basket" for the wrong question sounds just like him. The idea that he would do something like lie to a girl just to say the popular phrase, "Smile! You're on Candid Camera!" also sounds like him.

I think my friend did a good job, and so I will congratulate him. He hit Peter Griffin right on the spot!
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Old 29 Aug 2003, 12:07 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.Rebel should cut his own throat and bleed to death.
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Why the hell are you talking about Family Guy? Were you that fag from before who was saying it was a stupid show, and that it wasn't funny, and then eveyone bashed you about it? ya I believe that was you...
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Old 29 Aug 2003, 01:17 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Why someone would waste their time to think of that... I don't know but whatever...
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Old 29 Aug 2003, 01:50 AM   #8 (permalink)
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they are ...ok...but yeah...pretty lame
why would someone waste their time doing this?

-the gun..just sad
-the kiss thing...pretty sure they did it
-Howard Stern thing....needs a better set up
-Hollywood Squares and Candid Camera...really not funny
 
 


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